Eat Meat And Have A Sweet Year And Nachas

Dedicated By Dr. Ezra and Lauren Kest 

In honor of our children who teach us how to love, listen and be heard.  They should be blessed to find, see and recognize their zivuggim at the right time and always listen well, be heard and feel listened to. 

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This week's parsha, Re'ey, tells us that we can eat meat, "When Hashem your God, expands your boundary, as He has spoken to you, and you say, 'I will eat meat,' because your soul desires to eat meat, you may eat meat, according to every desire of your soul." 

Rashi tells us, "In the desert, however, the meat of a non-consecrated animal was forbidden to them, unless one first consecrated it and offered it up as a peace offering." 

This is the opinion of Rabbi Yishmael in the Talmud, who says that once they entered Israel they were permitted to eat meat for pleasure, however, in the desert they were only permitted to eat meat from the peace offerings that they brought to the Mishkan, otherwise they weren't permitted to eat meat for pleasure. But the Halacha (the law) is not in accordance with his opinion, it is in accordance with the opinion of Rabbi Akiva, who says that in the desert they were permitted to eat meat from strangers, even though it wasn't slaughtered kosherly, however when they entered Israel, they weren't permitted to eat meat from strangers any more. 

It is a debate on the words of our verse, "expands your boundary." According to Rabbi Akiva, it means an expansion in wealth, when they become wealthy and they could afford it, they may eat meat. According to Rabbi Yishmael, it means expansion in property, when they get the land, they would be permitted to eat meat for pleasure. 

And Rashi, when explaining the words, "expands your boundary," cites the opinion of Rabbi Akiva, "The Torah teaches proper conduct, that one should not desire to eat meat unless [one lives] in abundance and wealth." 

It makes sense that Rashi cites the opinion of Rabbi Yishmael even though the Halacha is not in accordance with him, because in his commentary on the Torah he gives us the simple meaning, not the Halachic ruling. And being that, "These and these are the words of the Living G-d," meaning that both the opinion of Rabbi Yishmael and Rabbi Akiva are from Hashem, it is in his right to use the words of Rabbi Yishmael. 

But how can he cite both the opinions of Rabbi Yishmael and Rabbi Akiva, which seem to be opposing opinions? We must conclude that being that Rashi brings them both, it must be that in their essence, they are based on the same reasoning. As will be explained. 

We also have to ask: Why would Rashi tell us Rabbi Yishmael's opinion, when the Halacha goes according to Rabbi Akiva? 

To understand this, we have to delve into the deeper meaning of this debate. 

The reason that Hashem gave us the mitzvos, is because through the performance of mitzvos with physical objects, in a physical place, and at a physical time (as time is also a creation and only exists in the physical world), we refine the physical and infuse it with G-dliness, thereby making it into a home for Hashem. 

The question is: Did this work begin in the desert or when they entered the land? 

According to Rabbi Yishmael, they weren't able to refine the physical in the desert, they could only have dealt with holiness, therefore they were only permitted to eat meat from the peace offerings, which were holy. Once they entered Israel they were stronger, they were able to refine the physical. Because the holy service to Hashem in the desert strengthened them, it was a preparation for the essential work, refining the physical. 

According to Rabbi Akiva, the work of refining the physical began in the desert, albeit in a limited way, because you can't truly infuse non kosher meat with G-dliness, the only thing that they were able to do, is the mitzvah of not eating blood, which is the life force of the animal and it represents the enthusiasm and the passionate desire for the meat. Once they entered the land, they were no longer permitted to eat non kosher meat, because they were stronger, and were able to do the work of refining the physical, so if they wanted to have meat, it had to be kosher. 

Now we can understand why Rashi brings both opinions, because in their essence, they are the same. 

And now we will understand why Rashi brings the opinion of Rabbi Yishmael even though the Halacha goes according to Rabbi Akiva. Because Rashi is talking to us, and our service to Hashem has to follow the path of Rabbi Yishmael. And this is true for all areas in life. At first you have to shun everything that is not holy, but when you become stronger, you must work with the physical and refine it. This is a never ending process, as you do this work, you constantly get stronger and stronger, what you were able to refine yesterday, is not enough today, because now you can handle a deeper level of the physical world and refine it. 

This can be applied to our daily lives. In the morning, we have to shun the physical and envelope ourselves in prayer and Torah study, only after do we eat a proper meal and go to work, where you deal with the most physical things. 

The week also follows the same pattern. "Shabbos blesses the days (that follow)." Shabbos is like the desert, where we bask in holiness, and it is Shabbos that prepares us, blesses the week, when we do the main service working with the physical. 

The year is the same. The holidays are a great holy time that prepares us for our work all year. And the month of Elul is the desert, the preparation for the holidays. This is one of the connections between our parsha and the time of the year. Because parshas Re'ey is read on the Shabbos before the month of Elul, when we bless the new month, or on Rosh Chodesh Elul itself. 

Being that my son Shalom will be having his Bar Mitzvah party this coming week, I will connect this with the idea of a Bar Mitzvah. 

The same idea applies to life in general and to a Bar Mitzvah boy in particular. The first years of life until Bar or Bas Mitzvah is the desert, the preparation for being a Jew, that is why we insulate our children from anything unholy in those years. From the Bar and Bas Mitzvah begins the preparation for life and the time of marriage, when he or she will go into the physical world of business and making a home. This is a critical time, when one has to form the correct notion of Judaism and life, what is important and what is not important, skills for life, principles to live by. This is the time that one acquires the main skills in Torah study, basking in the holiness and light of yeshiva. And this is the most important skill, because this is the foundation, the source. It is the meaning, the purpose and the reason. It is everything. 

Through following this path in our service to Hashem, we will have good days, good weeks, good months and a happy and sweet new year. 

And may we merit to have nachas from all of our children and grandchildren.  

I Will Be Going to New York

Dear friends,

With Hashem's help, I will be taking a trip to NY next week with my family, from Wednesday September 4th to Wednesday September 11th. If you would like to visit, please text or whatsapp (917)634-0706 or email rabbi@chabadwestvillage.com

This is a big undertaking for my wife, family, friends, Hatzolo and the Hurwitz family fund. I am grateful to them for making this trip possible, I don't know when I will be able to do it again.

If you would like to help, please give to hurwitzfamilyfund.com

Happiness Is All Perspective

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This week's parsha, Eikev, tells us how Hashem tested the Jewish people with the manna. "And He afflicted you and made you hungry and fed you manna, which you did not know, nor did your forefathers know, so that He would make you know that man does not live by bread alone, but rather by, whatever comes forth from the mouth of Hashem does man live." Then it says, "Who fed you manna in the desert, which your forefathers did not know, in order to afflict you and in order to test you, to benefit you in your end, and you will say to yourself, 'My strength and the might of my hand that made all this wealth for me.' But you must remember Hashem your G-d, for it is He that gives you strength to make wealth..." 

How could the manna, "bread from heaven," which was totally G-dly, fed them for forty years in the desert and had every flavor, serve as a means to test and challenge the Jewish people? 

How did the manna afflict them? 

In general, there are two kinds of tests or challenges, the test of affluence and the test of poverty. The manna had both of these characteristics. On one hand, it was G-dly, had every flavor, and the Talmud tells us that when they went to collect the manna, they would find with it precious stones and gems, so it came with both spiritual and physical wealth. On the other hand, the verse says, "Who fed you manna... in order to afflict you." 

The Talmud tells us two opinions as to why it caused them to suffer. It never gave them complete satisfaction, either because they were only able to collect it for one day at a time, tomorrow was uncertain, and "You can't compare one who has bread in his basket, to one who doesn't have bread in his basket." When you have food, you are less hungry, because you have the security of knowing that you can eat whenever you want to. Or because although it tasted like anything, it didn't look like the food they were tasting, and "You can't compare one who sees (his food) and eats, to one who doesn't see (his food) and eats." (Like Crystal Pepsi.) 

Although they had the most amazing G-dly food, they weren't satisfied, either because they couldn't hold on to it, or because it didn't have the right look. But these flaws are not real, they were only perceived flaws. 

The same is true about the study of Torah, compared to other subjects. Other subjects are limited, you can master the subject, and that is very satisfying. However Torah is unlimited, no matter how much you know, you are left wanting more, its completeness is elusive. The more you know, the more hungry you are for another angle, deeper, higher, etc. 

The same is true within Torah itself. On one hand, you have the revealed Torah (Mishnah, Talmud, Halacha, etc.), which although it is Hashem's infinite wisdom, being that it comes to the world dressed in physical cases and scenarios, its study can sometimes leave you satisfied. On the other hand, the hidden or inner Torah (Chassidus, Kabballa, etc.) is Hashem's pure infinite wisdom, it's not dressed up in the physical, the more you know, the more hungry you are for deeper, higher, etc. 

The hunger for Torah and especially the inner Torah, is only in your perception, you perceive that there is more, so you are hungry. 

That means that the only true flaw is in the one who is perceiving it. The way to overcome these flaws is to go out of himself, nullify his own existence to Hashem, then his perception will be Hashem's, where everything is good and truly satisfying. 

The same is true for the manna. How did one find satisfaction in the manna? He had to know that the manna was pure infinite G-dliness that came into the physical world and given to him as a gift from Hashem. if he will humble himself, nullify himself, totally negate his own existence and see that it's all from Hashem, he will truly be happy and satisfied. Because everything that comes from Him is good, there are no flaws. 

Now we will understand why it continues. "And you will say to yourself, 'My strength and the might of my hand that made all this wealth for me.' But you must remember Hashem your G-d, for it is He that gives you strength to make wealth..." Because the manna served as the paradigm for true happiness and satisfaction, the recognition and the true perception that everything he has is from Hashem. 

When he has this perspective, everything in life becomes good. Since he is humble, he sees not only the spiritual, but also the physical is good and holy, there is no difference, because it is all from Hashem. 

The same could be applied to our daily lives. Many of us struggle with happiness, we are often dissatisfied with the hand that we have been dealt. It is all based on your perspective and perception. When faced with a challenge, if you think that it is all your doing or man's doing, "my strength and the might of my hand that has made all this wealth," then you are truly in the hole of unhappiness, self pity and self loathing, but when you recognize that it is all from Hashem, "for it is He that gives you strength to make wealth," then you could find meaning in any situation or at least the knowledge that it is from Hashem, will take away your self pity and self loathing, and you will be happy with yourself. 

I recognize that sometimes we are presented with such a devastating challenge that no amount of positive thinking will soothe the pain. But knowing that it is from Hashem will make things a little bit easier. 

Happiness doesn't mean that you walk around with a smile all day, it means that you are satisfied with yourself and your situation, and that is based on your perspective. 

I have been asked: How do you stay positive through the devastating challenge that you are faced with, ALS and being paralyzed? The hardest things for me, is not being able to be the father and husband that I want to, I struggle with that every day. Though I know that I can't do anything to fix the situation, barring a miracle from Hashem. It hurts not to be able to kiss and hug my children, not to be able to talk and play with them. But as far as everything else is concerned, I say, "What keeps me going, is the realization that Hashem is real, that He has a plan for the world, and I am part of it. Everyone is a part of it, and everyone's part is important. So if He put me in this position, He must want something of me that I can only do in this position. When you see it this way. Instead of feeling down when you are in a challenging situation, you are filled with a sense of purpose, and you are lifted up." 

May all our suffering come to an end, with the coming of Moshiach. May he come soon. 

In The Darkness The Deepest Love Can Be Found

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This week's parsha, Devarim, is always read the Shabbos before Tisha B'Av or on Tisha B'Av itself. Tisha B'Av is the saddest day of the year, it is the day that both our Temples were destroyed and we were driven into exile. The first time for seventy years and the second lasted until the present, over nineteen hundred and fifty years. 

The Talmud tells us that in the Holy of Holies, the Keruvim, the cherubs (in the first Temple era they were on the top of the Ark, in the second Temple they were a design on the wall) would reflect the relationship between Hashem and the Jewish people. When we were in good standing they faced each other, when we were not they faced away from each other and when we were closest they were in an intimate embrace. 

The Midrash tells us that by the destruction of the Second Temple, when the Romans entered the Holy of Holies, they found the Keruvim intertwined in the most intimate embrace. 

If the Temple was being destroyed, it would seem that our relationship was on the rocks and the Keruvim should have been facing away from each other. Why were the Keruvim intertwined in the most intimate embrace? We are forced to conclude that somehow our relationship was closer than ever. How? 

Sometimes in a relationship there is a dark time, but it is not a sign that the relationship is on the rocks, just the opposite, it is a sign that the relationship is in a transition, with much better things to come. 

For example. If a guru is teaching his students and all of a sudden, a bolt of wisdom enters his mind and he knows that if he doesn't take the time at that moment to ponder on the thought, he will lose it. Either he could ponder about it while he is teaching, only giving half of his attention to his students, they will notice that he is not entirely with them and feel unimportant, or he can totally engross himself in the matter and stop teaching altogether, it will be very awkward and they will feel entirely ignored. 

In truth, it's for their sake that he is ignoring them, because as soon as he solidifies the piece of wisdom, he will share it with them. And as a matter of fact, the more he ignores them, the better he will get the idea and the better he will be able to impart the knowledge. By ignoring them, his love for his students is greater. 

The same is true for this exile, there is a reason that Hashem sent us into exile, it's not just to atone for our sins, there is something greater that we are accomplishing in this dark exile. 

The proof that it is not only to atone for our sins, is that if it was only for us to atone for our sins, the further we get into the exile the easier it should get. Because after a while some of our sins would be atoned for and after another while more of our sins would be atoned for, each time the exile should get easier and easier. But it is getting darker and darker, there must be another reason for the exile. 

When Moshiach comes and the exile ends, we won't go back to the second Temple revelation of G-dliness, or to the first Temple revelation, it will be infinitely greater. The revelation of Hashem will be his true essence from beyond all of existence, He will give us His true self, there is no greater revelation. And it's through our efforts in this exile that we are accomplishing this revelation. That is why it continues to get darker and darker, because the greater the darkness, the more powerful our service to Hashem is and the closer we get to Moshiach, the more our service has to accomplish. 

The greatest closeness to Hashem can only be achieved through the exile. And that is why the Keruvim were intertwined in the most intimate embrace, because Hashem and the Jewish people were about to set out on the ultimate quest, to come the closest possible. Although our relationship was strained, the repair of our relationship and making it the greatest possible was about to begin. So it was truly a loving moment, and possibly the most loving moment of all. 

And this is the reason that at the Bris Bein Habesarim, The Covenant Between the Parts, it says, "fear and a great darkness..." And the Midrash tells us that this refers to the exile. From the beginning, there was a plan to have the exile and Avraham knew it. Now why would he agree to something like that? Because he understood what it would give us, Hashem's essence, and he thought it was worth it and so will we when Moshiach comes. 

The same is true about marriage. A loving couple could fall on difficult times, full of frustration and hurt. This can happen even though they have no intention to be hurtful to one another, but it is all done with no malice, and they have no idea how hurtful they are being until it all blows up. Then they are thrown in to darkness and it feels like exile. They could feel in despair. 

How are they to deal with this? 

They know that they love each other and they know that they don't want to be the cause of their spouse's hurt and suffering. 

If they use this opportunity to work on their marriage, learn to understand each other better and are truly remorseful, they could attain forgiveness, take their relationship to a whole new level and their love deeper than they could have ever imagined. And when that happens, they will look back at the dark time as a good thing and the moment of their blow up as the best thing that ever happened to them. 

May we see the coming of Moshiach soon, and realize how it was this dark exile that brought us the greatest revelation, the true essence of Hashem. May we all have good, close and deep marriages. And may we merit to see Tisha B'Av become the happiest day of the year. May it happen soon. 

It Is Our Victories That Make Us Who We Are

Dear friends, 

With thanks to Hashem, I am happy to announce that I began the sixth cycle of dvar Torahs. 

Over the past few weeks, it has been a struggle to write. I have been spending so much time writing on my eye gaze computer to get these Dvar Torahs out. It was taking me three times as long as it used to and sometimes I didn't even finish them. Needless to say, it was taking me away from my family. 

Therefore, I am taking my wife's advice and I will be writing shorter dvar Torahs, but I am going to put more of my heart into them. 

I hope you enjoy it. 

Yitzi 

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This week's parsha, Maasei, lists the travels of the Jewish people, from when they left Egypt until they entered Israel, there were forty two places where they camped. 

The Baal Shem Tov tells us that the forty two travels parallels the life of a Jewish person, every one of the travels represents a period in one's life, with different happenings and different challenges. Birth, being the Exodus from Egypt, and the entry into Israel, being the end of life, the entry into the world of truth. 

This is difficult to understand, because some of the places where they traveled, are known for the terrible episodes that happened there, where the Jewish people went against Hashem. Does it mean that we are condemned to an episode in our lives of sinfulness? 

For example, one of the places where they camped was Kivros Hatava, where the Jewish people complained about the fact that Hashem took them out of Egypt and that they missed the food they had there. They even cried about it. They weren't happy with the manna, the "bread from heaven," they craved meat. Hashem gave them a lot of meat, but many of the complainers died, and they were buried there. That is why it is called Kivros Hatava, which means, "the graves of those who craved." 

Why would we want to go through that? 

The Baal Shem Tov explains that every one of the places could have had two outcomes, positive or negative. And it was up to the Jewish people to choose between a positive or a negative outcome. It could have been "the graves of those who craved," or Kivros Hatava could have been taken literally, to mean "The graves of the craving." They could have buried their desire, done what is good in the eyes of Hashem, been grateful for being taken out of Egypt and for the holy manna that fell from heaven. And that was probably the true intended purpose of traveling there, but we failed. 

The same is true for every one of us, we will have every one of these "travels," and it is our choice to make it what it ultimately will be, a positive or negative episode in our life. 

I know how hard life can be, the challenges Hashem throws our way are so great, they can be paralyzing and debilitating, we could feel that they are too much to handle and maybe they are. It can be a desire that you feel you can't overcome. 

Right now, before the coming of Moshiach, it is especially difficult, it is the darkest time. It is so difficult to stay positive through our challenges, especially if they are prolonged. 

In this situation, sometimes you will overcome and sometimes you may fail, but you should know that every time you overcome, Hashem revels in your victory, it deals a great blow to the forces of evil and it brings Moshiach ever closer. And the greater the challenges you overcome, the more powerful is the effect. 

Don't let your failures get you down, instead count your victories, be proud of your victories, and know how much your victories accomplish. 

In my home, we suffer from a prolonged devastating challenge, on top of the regular challenges that my children, my wife and I have to deal with. Every day, every hour and every minute, is a challenge, and the suffering and anguish are sometimes unbearable. Sometimes we are victorious and sometimes it is just too much. Yes, we are just like everybody else, I too have my moments. But it is our victories that matter, that's why I am so proud of my wife and my children, because with all we are going through, they are amazing and have good hearts. 

You are also amazing, revel in your victories they will strengthen you and empower you. Hashem is proud of you. 

It is enough of the suffering, may Hashem send Moshiach, when "Hashem will erase the tears from upon every face." May it happen soon. 

Pinchas - The Key To The Redemption

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This week's parsha, Pinchas, begins, "Pinchas... diverted My anger from upon the Children of Israel by zealously avenging Me among them..." Therefore, "I hereby bestow My covenant of peace upon him." And Hashem then gave him "eternal priesthood," meaning, that "him and all of his descendants after him," will be Kohanim. 

The reward for his actions was that he became a Kohen. You can't earn to be a Kohen, neither can you be rewarded it. Hashem made Aaron and his children who were anointed with him Kohanim and all the children who would be born from them from that point and on would be naturally holy. Hashem put it into nature, that their descendants, and only their descendants, would be Kohanim. 

Rashi tells us about being a Kohen, that just as Hashem separated between night and day, and no matter what, nothing can change that, so too, he separated Aaron and his sons to be holy, and nothing can change that. 

Pinchas was born before and he wasn't anointed with his father, Elazar. So how could he be awarded for his actions and efforts, "zealously avenging Me among them," to be a Kohen? 

Parshas Pinchas continues with the fallout of the Midian episode and Pinchas's act of zealotry - the command to go to war with Midian and the counting of the Jewish people, to see how many were left after the plague that Pinchas ended with his act of zealotry - then it continues with things that pertain to the land of Israel - the way they would divide the land of Israel, the appointment of Yehoshua, who would lead the Jewish people into the land, and the parsha ends with the routine sacrifices, of which some of them would be brought first when they enter the land. - 

Being that the name of the parsha is Pinchas, and the name of a parsha encompasses the theme of the entire parsha, that means that the entry into the land of Israel has a direct connection to Pinchas. What is the connection between Pinchas and the entry into Israel? 

Pinchas represents his actions, that he was zealous for Hashem. So the real question is: How does Pinchas's way of serving Hashem connect to the entry into Israel? 

Our sages say about the entry into Israel, If not for their sin, the final redemption would have come as they entered the land the first time. That means that the first entry into the land, even though the final redemption didn't come, it was similar to it and we can take a lesson from the details of the first entry for the ultimate, final and complete redemption, that we are waiting for. 

Pinchas definitely has to do with the final redemption, as our sages say, "Pinchas is Eliyahu," the one who will herald the final redemption. 

In the time of Moshiach, "no longer will your Master be covered." That the essence of Hashem from beyond existence will, shine openly in existence, even in the physical world. 

We are created in the image of Hashem, meaning that our spiritual makeup is in the image of Hashem. Just as Hashem is in existence and beyond existence, so too, our neshamas are in existence and beyond existence. The neshama has five parts, there is the nefesh, ruach, neshama and chaya, that work within existence and then there is the yechida, that is one with Hashem's essence beyond existence. 

In order to bring Moshiach we have to tap into our yechida, in order to draw Hashem's essence that is beyond existence into the world. 

This is the meaning of what our sages say, "If Israel (the Jewish people) will do teshuva, they will be redeemed, and if they don't do teshuva, they won't be redeemed." It is clear that the word teshuva in this saying, doesn't mean plain repentance, because it says,"and if they don't do teshuva, they won't be redeemed." That means that every one of us has to do teshuva. But what if somebody is good and doesn't have to do teshuva? We must conclude that teshuva here is something much greater, something that even the greatest Tzadik could do. 

There is a deeper level of teshuva, to return to your essence, your yechida, the part of you that is one with Hashem's essence beyond existence. And when you tap into your yechida, all the blemishes that were caused by sins automatically fall away, because it's Impossible for our essence to have flaws. So if you tap into your yechida, all sins automatically fall away and you draw the essence of Hashem beyond existence into the world. 

How does one tap into the yechida? 

It is through serving Hashem with true self sacrifice, and that is what Pinchas did. He acted for Hashem, even though it put him in harms way. He wasn't thinking of being a hero or what he's going to get out of it, he wanted to do what Hashem wants and to put an end to the plague that killed 24,000. 

There are different types of self sacrifice. The is the one who when he is faced with a situation that might require self sacrifice, he turns to the code of Jewish law or to his rabbi, to see if he should sacrifice his life or not. This is calculated self sacrifice, not pure self sacrifice. 

Then there is the self sacrifice of Pinchas. Where everything Hashem wants is done with self sacrifice, without any calculations, this is pure self sacrifice. 

If Pinchas would have asked, he would have been told no, even though the law was on his side. This is one of the cases in Torah, where the law is that zealots could take matters into their own hands, but as a matter of policy, we don't direct people to do it, as a matter of fact, if they ask, we tell them no. 

Now in the time right before Moshiach, in order to draw Hashem's essence that is beyond existence into the world, we have to tap into our yechida, and in order to do that we have to do everything Hashem wants with self sacrifice. Every mitzvah, learning Torah and even the most mundane daily activities could be done for Hashem with true self sacrifice. 

Even though our service to Hashem is finite, because we are finite, it draws Hashem's infinite essence. And that is what is going to happen when Moshiach comes, the reward for our efforts will be the revelation of the essence of Hashem that is drawn by our finite service and He will bestow upon us His infinite essence beyond existence, there will be a meshing of the two. 

That is also what happened to Pinchas. One can't earn or be rewarded to be a Kohen, so we must conclude that being Aaron's grandson, he was able to be a Kohen, but it wasn't until his act of true self sacrifice that Hashem bestowed upon him "eternal priesthood," to be a Kohen, infinite in finite. This is hinted to in the verse, "I hereby bestow My covenant of peace upon him." To make

peace is to bring opposing sides together, the meshing of opposites. 

And this is perhaps the reason that more times than not, we read parshas Pinchas in the three weeks, when our Temples were destroyed and we were driven into exile. And parshas Pinchas is the remedy and the key to bringing Moshiach. May he come soon. 

Mothers Over Fathers

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This week's parsha, Balak, tells us how Balam set out to curse the Jewish people, but instead, he blessed them. In his words he said, "For from their beginning, I see them as mountain peaks and I behold them as hills." 

The Midrash tells us that mountain peaks refer to our patriarchs and hills refer to our matriarchs. 

One of the differences between a father and mother in relationship to their children, is the way they contribute to the birth of their children. The father gives a cell, which includes the baby in potential, but in the cell you don't see any details. The mother takes the cell and over nine months in her womb, she develops it into a complete baby with all the details, head, shoulders, knees and toes, and the rest of the limbs and organs. That is the reason that more times than not, a child is closer to his or her mother than their father, because the mother created her child with all the details. The mother's relationship to her child is commonly one of love and closeness, on the other hand, the father's relationship to his child is commonly one of fear and distance. 

The same is true about our patriarchs and matriarchs, the relationship between us and the patriarchs, is one of awe and distance, and our relationship to the matriarchs, is one of love and closeness. That is why the patriarchs are the mountain tops, far and aloof, and the word used to say that he sees them is arenu, which means to gaze from a distance. On the other hand, the matriarchs are hills, which are closer, and the word used to say that he sees them is ashurenu, which means to see at close range. 

Everything in the physical world has its source in the spiritual. What is the spiritual source of a father and mother giving birth to a child? Emotions are called the children of the mind. For example, it is the understanding of the mind that produces the love or fear we have for Hashem. The deeper the understanding the more mature are the emotions. 

The mind that gives birth to the emotions is divided into two parts, chachma and Bina, which are the father and mother. 

Chachma is the father, it is the conception of an idea, the eureka moment that comes to you in a flash, you have the whole concept, but if you don't stay with the idea and contemplate its details, you will lose it. 

Bina is the mother, it is contemplation, which is the breakdown of the idea into all of its details, solidifying the idea and making it yours. It is Bina that gives birth to the emotions and it's closer to the emotions than chachma, because there is a degree of separation between chachma and the emotions. 

Chachma and Bina are the first of the ten attributes of the soul. The first three are the attributes of the mind, the next six are the emotions, and the last one determines how the six emotions express themselves. 

The ten attributes of the soul are a reflection of the ten attributes of Hashem, the way He relates to the world. Just as chachma and Bina give birth to the emotions, so too, the Divine chachma and Bina give birth to the Divine emotions, which are the building blocks of creation. Since Bina actually gives birth to the building blocks of creation, it relates to the physical world, on the other hand, chachma doesn't relate to the world, because it is separate. 

Chachma represents the view from above, that only Hashem exists, when you see things from this perspective, your entire existence is nullified, because there is only Hashem. Bina represents the view from below. From this perspective everything exists, but you see everything as part of Hashem, you are part of Him as well, and your ego is nullified before Hashem. 

Since we are all descendants of our patriarchs and matriarchs, we all inherit both perspectives. The view of our patriarchs, Hashem's oneness from above, which nullifies existence, and the view of our matriarchs, the oneness of Hashem from below, which nullifies the ego. 

Since the most important thing is to make a home for Hashem in the physical world, to make this world into a vessel for G-dliness, therefore the matriarchs perspective is more important, as Hashem said to Avraham, "everything that Sarah tells you, listen to her voice." 

Every Jewish home is a small world, it has all the ten attributes. The father is chachma and the mother is Bina, and just as the matriarchs, the mother's role in the home is more important. Although she receives from the father as Bina receives from chachma, she knows what her husband wants and she implements it, as our sages say, "Who is a kosher woman? One who does the will of her husband." She is the one who can make it happen, because she is the one who is in charge of the home and spends more time with the children. 

And if her husband doesn't want to go on the proper path, then we can read an alternate translation to the words of our sages, "Who is a kosher woman? One who makes the will of her husband." A wife is in a position that she could influence her husband, using her womanly wisdom she has the ability to motivate him to reach ever higher. 

When you do that, Hashem dwells in your home and it is filled with blessing. 

I am blessed to see this in my own personal home, as my wife Dina is always pushing me to be a better father, a better husband, a better rabbi, a better Yid and a better person. I owe so much to her. The real hero in my life is Dina. 

May we merit to see the coming of Moshiach, when we will see the woman's part in bringing of Moshiach, when the feminine will be greater. May it happen soon. The time has come. 

Dedicated to my son Shalom who is celebrating his bar mitzvah this week, and to my wife Dina who is the backbone of our home.